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2/17/12 11:00 am

It's time to fall in love with myself :)

12/29/10 11:10 pm

Getting drunk while on facebook is never a good idea.




But it's still hilarious.

5/5/10 11:34 am

I'm thinking of brushing my hair...

10/21/09 08:49 pm

I'm kind of drunk and most definitely in love. (The Big Kind.)

10/1/09 04:41 pm

Things are different but good. It's raining and a cat is meowing.

7/27/09 03:51 am

I've got a week left in Chicago. Hey, that went fast.

Honestly I am so glad I did this. It was exactly what I needed. To put myself in an unfamiliar city with only knowing one or two people was a change. I don't even really miss being at school. I am completely content with myself and while I miss the ones I love... I am happy by myself. Finally. I haven't smoked pot all summer and my mind feels clear. I have been thrown into situations that I didn't think I could handle (fucking overnight shift being the only girl!) But even through that experience, I made friends. I was fine. I was myself and that is fine. I'm finally coming to terms with being a woman. That's right, I have a vagina. Do you? Cool, I don't wanna see it. Close your legs!

I'm excited to go back home. Leslie will be home. Then I will take a much needed road trip to New York! I will miss being able to ride my bike anywhere I need to go, and I will miss not knowing anybody. But I also love where I'm going. It's a great feeling, loving everywhere I go.

Today, I was aimlessly riding my bike around because it was a beautiful day and I walked into this book store. It ended up being a meeting place for revolutionaries! They were having a meeting and showed a film, so I stayed and later jumped in on the discussion about how revolution is more than possible, but is a necessity right now. It was great to randomly find that much needed comfort with strangers. They were really interested on where I go to school and I really enjoyed talking about agriculture and the need for family farms.

I'm applying to go to Italy Spring semester to work on an organic farm in the mountains. I hope I get in. If I don't, I'm AT LEAST going to Boulder, CO for spring break. This need for travel is an incredible feeling and is stronger than ever.

7/17/09 02:47 am

Working the night shift, I have realized there is a certain honesty that shocks my body around the early hours of the mornin'.

We won't always be young and beautiful and we may not always have each other, either. So pick up a good book and let me know how the ending turns out. Do you want to hear a story? There's beauty in everything you touch. A modern Midas, imagine that. There are some cooky ramblers out there, all wanting money or sex or maybe just a light sandwich. They want something, though. Cover your soul and head to the beach. Watch the waves a while and have a beer. Feelin' a little funny? Got some itch in the back of your heart ya just can't get to? Let the guy beside you scratch a while, but don't be sad when the bar closes and you bike home in opposite directions. It was just a scratch. Want to see a real pirate ship? Follow me!



Smile.

6/30/09 01:24 am

Gosh its hard being away from everyone. I dislike this feeling of waiting for summer to end, because its summer! And I'm having fun in a new place. Ultimately, though, school is where my home is. I took being surrounded by so many beautiful people for granted while at school I think. I mean, how many times in your life can you be surrounded by best friends every day and snuggle up in bed with a wonderful boy every night?

I can't wait until August when I get to see him (and Phish!)

Last night I saw the Avett Brothers and I had a lot of fun. Tons of dancing! And Elana, Mike, and Cecilia were there! They didn't play my favorite song, but its okay because they played some second and third favorites.

I got crazy sick last week, the same sickness my sister has. I think its e coli, personally. We don't really have any other systems beside lack of appetite and not digesting our food. And we only know this because Grace is diabetic and even if she drinks a huge container of juice her blood sugar is still low. E coli attacks the digestive system so I think we got it from the water that comes out of the refridgerator. I'm feeling better now, though.

Tomorrow night I start work. I'm doing overnight stock (insane) so the hours are from 10 pm to 6 am. I'm trying to stay up as late as I can tonight so my body isn't fucked tomorrow night. Should be interesting.

6/19/09 06:06 pm

Scratch that last post about how Chicago blows!! I got a job at Whole Foods mothafuckuaaaaaaaaas!
I'm seeing Dr. Dog tonight!
I'm reading at the next open mic night!
I'm seeing the Avett Brothers June 28!
Pitchfork Festival in July!!

Life is good.

6/13/09 03:49 pm

Honestly things are not going as smooth as I had planned this summer. My job with GrassRoots did not work out. No one should have to do what they ask their employees to do. Basically they make you go out to the suburbs of Chicago and knock/buzz (apartments) doors and ask for money. The hours are from 2-10:30 and you have to make $150 on average daily or else they fire you. No overtime, barely making minimum wage, not fun. Everyone who I was observing just seemed ridiculously miserable. And apparently there have been countless lawsuits against them for how unfair they treat their employees. So I opted out of that one. Alllast week I pretty much applied everywhere and am now waiting to hear back.

Honestly, I'm not sure ifmoving to this city was the best choice. I absolutelylove living withym sister, but shes barely home. She leaves for workaround 7 am and gets back around 6. I only know one other person here but he is living with his girlfriend so I feel weird hanging out with them. Its weird not being able to just go out into the woods on nice days, and I feel really detached from nautre. I can barely afford transportation here by bus- 2.25 a ride. Everything is so damn far away, even if I do find something to do. Nothing is free, I mean yes there are free events but the whole trasportation thing sucks. I could be bumming around Maine and it would honestly cost a lot less- borrowing my moms car, bumming rides off of my friends.

I mean its only been a week here but I told my dad if I don't have a job by July, I would come home (after Pitchfork festival). Because living here, I'm just losing money instead of staying at a stale poor. Summer has always been my favorite season, and I don't want this city to ruin it. I think I'm also in a bad mood because Keith left for camp today and doesn't really get service so now I only get to talk to him like 2-3 times a week, if that.

I feel bad though because I know Grace wants me to stay here as long as I can because shes lonely lliving here, so I can't really leave, even if I am counting down the days.

I just don't fit in, I want to be on the farm growing food, not fucking working retail for corporate America.
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